Year: 2024
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Exterminate!
Marxism? Dead end. Capitalism? Also a dead end. Really, take your pick—both roads lead straight off a cliff. Look at Russia: they tried the whole “workers’ paradise” thing, got a taste of it, and then went sprinting back to capitalism like someone who realized their “vacation” was actually a multi-level marketing scheme.
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US Vice President Kills US Secretary Of Treasury. US Military General On Trial For Spying AKA Treason AKA Sedition AKA Espionage
Ah yes, American politics—the original reality show. A U.S. Vice President kills a U.S. Secretary of the Treasury. Sounds like a far-fetched plot twist, right? But nope, that was Aaron Burr, the VP, putting a bullet in Alexander Hamilton, founding father and Treasury genius. They called it a “duel,” but it was basically the 1800s […]
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Never Worked Before. Won’t Work Now. The 1798 Sedition Act
Oh, a crackdown with the Alien Act of 1798? Sure, just like President John Adams did. And, you know, that turned out great for him. Nothing says “wise political strategy” like using a vaguely authoritarian law to target your own citizens. Adams aimed it at his political enemies, of course, thinking it’d be a foolproof […]
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Get Trump!
Swifties must be thinking this after Trump wins election.
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It’s Coming. Don’t You Understand!
We have to get out of here. And soon. Because something is coming.
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Religion Banned
Religion is banned. Can you believe it? Probably not. But then again, neither could all those folks in China or Russia way back when. And now here we are—welcome to the club. Turns out, if history has a sense of humor, it’s definitely dark. Oh, but don’t look so surprised. The Bible said this was […]
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