What really is time? Oh, buckle up, because your version of it is as unique and broken as any one of the trillions of galaxies out there. In fact, time is so personal, you might as well start telling people, “Sorry, I run on my time zone.”

According to atomic clocks, time is relative—just like Einstein tried to warn us before the universe hit us with this cosmic joke. Look at the Milky Way: planets? Time’s dragging. Stars? Same story. And black holes? Those lazy voids take it to the next level, slowing time down to an awkward, grinding halt. For us watching from a distance, time just stands still, while the poor soul inside the black hole? No big deal, time’s just trucking along like a Tuesday afternoon.

And Earth? Oh, Earth slows down time the closer you get to it. Maybe that’s why Mondays last a century and weekends flash by like a fever dream. But here’s the kicker: in some experiments, things have actually happened before they even started. That’s right—events beating their own starting gun. It’s like the universe is rigged with spoilers and determinism, laughing as we try to keep up.

So what is time? Maybe it’s just the universe’s ongoing prank, and we’re all stuck in slow-motion while trying to figure out the punchline.